Frustration

There are few things that I hate more than not being able to do something, having my hands tied. The moment I leave town, it seems like there are so many things that need my attention. I know that as soon as I get home nothing will happen, but then I have to turn around and leave again. I cannot imagine people who have to travel on a regular basis. It's hard enough to be gone for a day or two, but being stuck in a hotel room by yourself, training sessions with people you don't know - all for an entire week...it sucks. What's even worse is that as soon as I get home I have to get on a plane Monday morning and do it all over again. Of course all of this would have to happen when Suzy starts all kinds of new things both at school and at work. For some reason we got a parking ticket in front of our building on the station wagon since I'm not there to drive it (never mind that nobody else gets tickets). It's hard to stay focused when your heart and mind or on the other side of the country!

Here we go!

Well, it's about 7:45 am, over here in Federal Way, WA. Today starts my "official" World Vision orientation. I get to spend the morning with the four other new World Vision New York (WVNY) employees with some financial training. This afternoon I will be with the national Storehouse team. My boss wanted me to get the same training he had, so effectively I will be instructed on how to start and run an entire Storehouse from the ground up.
Last night the flight took five and a half hours, not too bad for getting from the east coast to the west coast. That is definitely the longest flight I have ever had while staying in the same country. I think the worst part is the time change. I can't imagine doing this all of the time. It just seems like everything out here takes longer. Even the sun rises half an hour later here than it does in NY (with the time change). I'll let you know how the day goes!

Macrina - the "fourth" Cappadocian

Gregory of Nyssa and Basil the Great had an older sister named Macrina. Gregory had such affection and respect for his older sister that he followed her advice and became a monastic. Her role in his life is similar to that of Monica in Augustine's life. As a way to give her voice to others, Gregory immortalizes her in his own writings in a dialogue similar to that of Plato's treatment of Socrates. On the Soul and the Resurrection is the result of his conversations with her, shortly before her death.
In one of the questions he poses to her, Gregory asks Macrina about emotions. She replies that "emotions are neither virtuous nor wicked in themselves, since they are impulses of the soul which lie in the power of the users to serve good or otherwise. When their movement is toward the better, we shall declare that they are material for praise. If, on the other hand, their inclination is towards the worse, then they become passions and are named accordingly." She continues to explain this principle with the parable of the tares - the good seeds are our emotional impulses, the bad seeds are errors in our judgment of what is good. Turning the tables on how we think today - "it is the mind which misleads the emotions, not vice versa."

Some things never change.

Well, I finally broke the news to my boss on Saturday that I found a new job. Normally, I would have given him at least a two weeks notice before my last day, but he didn't exactly deserve that much courtesy. On Friday, December 30, he told me that I couldn't work for the next two weeks because he had some "personal stuff" to take care of. As far as I'm concerned that was my notice. He took the news surprisingly well, he even congratulated me on finding a good job with benefits. I kind of bothered me that he didn't seem to mind... Despite all of this I still offered to work a few Saturdays to close up a few projects left unfinished and to sort out all of the tools (the extra cash wouldn't hurt either). Last night he called and asked if I could come in this morning and put in a day of work since I don't start until Wednesday, and I agreed.
Now at this point you might assume that he would have enough work lined up for me to stay busy at least half of the day...but you would be wrong. We immediately fell into our usual pattern: I finished all the work he wanted by 10:30, he was still asleep, I go get coffee, he's still in bed, I get bored and leave by 11:30. That's right folks - not even a half day of work! He couldn't even get out of bed to see my on my "last day." I think I should have left sooner!

This is not Starbucks!

Today Suzy had to work at the library for a few hours, but she had to be there half an hour before they opened so I had some time to kill. Since there is a Starbucks nearby, I thought I might go and read for half an hour and grab a cup of coffee. On my way, I noticed "The Tea House" and made a conscious decision to support the local store rather than feed giant conglomerate. The place is actually pretty cool, it was quiet and had a great place to read while enjoying a fresh cup of tea. I went to the counter, seeing that they had some oolong right in front of me, ordered a simple cup of tea - nothing fancy. He asked if I wanted it to go, I replied with a "no," and added that I wanted to read for a little while. So he rang me up for a pot of tea. I quickly responded that I only wanted one cup because I wouldn't be there that long. Seeming a little perturbed, he said, "This is not Starbucks. If you want one cup, you have to take it with you. This tea house is for people who want to enjoy their tea." Feeling a bit reprimanded, I agreed to the full pot (which was only two cups anyway) and wound up spending almost an hour "enjoying" my tea.

On a lighter and more beautiful note today, here's an excerpt of Gregory's treatise On the Inscription of the Psalms (I.3.19). I'll just let this one speak for itself. Jerry, this one's for you:

"Once I heard a wise person elaborate on an idea about our nature. He said that each person is a miniature universe, having within himself everything that is in the great universe. And the ordered array of the universe is a musical harmony both richly complex and diverse, in tune with itself both in order and in rhythm and is in concord with itself and is never distracted from this symphonic accord even though we may contemplate essential differences in its various components. Just as the musician artistically plucks the strings with a pick, thus bringing forth melody in a rich variety of notes (for there would be no melody if all the strings sounded the same note), so in the same way, the temperament of the universe, which is composed of the richly diverse, particular thing we contemplate - [this temperament] plucks itself by means of an ordered and unchangeable rhythm; and in this way it creates a harmony of all the parts in relation to the whole, and sings this all-encompassing harmony in everything that exists. It is this harmony that the innermost self hears without employing the sense of hearing. Rather by stretching upwards and rising above our fleshly organs of sense, it listens to the hymnody of the heavens."

Nothing four hours won't fix...

When I was in college at Atlanta Christian College, I was thoroughly interested in studying New Testament Greek. I was a transfer student who came in on the middle of the year; needless to say I was bummed to find out I had to wait another semester before I could enroll in Greek. While in my second year of Greek, I served as the TA for the first year students grading papers and such. Not satisfied with just two years, I decided to take an additional semester with just me and Barry Blackburn, the Greek and New Testament professor. He would constantly get onto me for not remembering things I was supposed to have learned in previous semesters. When I asked him how he was able to do it, he had two replies. The first was simply - time, you have to spend a little time with it each day and it will never leave you. His second, one he always cracked a smile when he told it, was a story about a former student. Each time he asked the student how his Greek was coming along he always told Blackburn, "nothing four hours won't fix." After having tried and failed at both approaches, I still think the former is the better of the two. So, in an effort to revive my proficiency in Greek I've added a daily Greek New Testament verse to my sidebar from zhubert, in hopes that a little more will come back each day. If you're interested, they have some really cool tools to help with translation (something I will need to rely on for a while).

The mystery of the economy of the Resurrection

To continue with Gregory of Nyssa, he has an interesting analogy in his Argument against Apollinarius about the Resurrection. He suggests that if a reed were split entirely in two, and the points of one end were joined together again, the points at the other end would naturally line up as well. In this same way, the union of the body and soul that occurred in Christ at the Resurrection "brings all human nature, by its continuity, when it has been separated by death into body and soul, to their natural union by the hope of the Resurrection, effecting the concurrence of what has been separated." This is what Paul wrote of in Corinthians 15, that as we all die in Adam, so in Christ all shall live. As with the reed, from Adam's end our nature was split by sin - our body and soul being separated at death, but from Christ's end "nature assumes itself again, its division being completely united in the Resurrection of humanity according to Christ." Gregory points out that "we die with him who died for us; but since it is necessary for us to die willingly with him who willingly died, it is fitting to understand this to be the death which comes to those by free choice (baptism)." He believes that freely dying with Christ is the prerequisite for our sharing in the Resurrection. To draw this to a conclusion, Gregory again alludes to Paul - "we were buried with him by baptism into death, that by imitation of his death, the imitation of his Resurrection might also follow."
I don't know what your thoughts on baptism are (whether one must be baptized to "get to heaven" or whatever), but I believe it is helps to think about how all aspects of the spiritual life are connected and this reed analogy does that in a holistic way. Our participation in Christ in all things is essential if we intend to understand the nature of his love and dare to live with that same type of love in all we do.

The anxiety is over!

I finally heard from LeAnn today, my human resource contact at World Vision. They finally offered me the position of manager at The Storehouse in the South Bronx. Their offer is a little sweeter than I had expected. Tuesday I go down to Manhattan to fill out all the paperwork and sign all the necessary forms to become a full-fledged member of the World Vision team. Next week I will spend a few days getting acquainted with the place and try to settle in a little bit before being shipped off on Jan. 23 for orientation and training at the headquarters in Federal Way, WA. I get to spend a week there being indoctrinated by them only to hit the road again the following Monday for a whirlwind trip of the other Storehouses throughout the country. Luis (my new boss) and I will fly down to Pittsburgh to visit their facility, drive down to West Virginia and tour that site, drive back to Pitt to catch a flight to Chicago to see the oldest Storehouse, then finally fly back to NYC and back to my loving wife (who will no doubt be missing me pretty bad by then). Things look good, despite all of the initial traveling, though it will be a little overwhelming to suddenly be responsible for such a large operation. One of the benefits are the benefits: great health insurance with dental and vision, the non-profit equivalent of a 401K, and vacation and sick time to top it off. I'm almost 30 now, so I guess it's about time I got a real job! If you have a high speed connection, check out this video (it explains it better than I can).

Gregory of Nyssa - On Perfection

There is really no better place to begin studying Patristics than with the Cappadocian Fathers. The youngest of these three (or four...more later) is Gregory of Nyssa. Today's thought comes from his essay entitled On Perfection.
"The perfection of the Christian life...is that in which we participate not only by our mind and soul but in all the actions of our lives, so that our holiness may be complete, in accordance with the blessing pronounced by Paul, in our whole body and soul and spirit."
This excerpt falls into a larger argument on the understanding that our human nature is mutable and prone to change. These changes are brought about by things and situations we come in contact with throughout each day, leaving open the possibility for movement toward good or ill. Here one finds the greatest difference beween eastern and western Christian thought - western theology tends to focus on sin and its effect, whereas eastern theology emphasizes the possibility and pursuit of the good in spite of sin.
"In truth the finest aspect of our mutability is the possibility of growth in good; and this capacity for improvement transforms the soul, as it changes, more and more into the divine."
This pursuit of God is an unending cycle that is so essential. There are times when we do not improve and we move away from God, but it is essential that we are perpetually in a state of progression, never at rest or satisfied in our desire to participate in the divine.
"For that perfection consists in our never stopping in our growth in good, never circumscribing our perfection by any limitation."
We can all do and be better than we are...we just sometimes lack the desire or motivation. I pray that today we find that reserve in ourselves that gives us the conviction to pursue the perfection of Christ.

Patristic thought of the day

I was thinking earlier today about my education. I have spent so much of my time studying Patristics, theology of the early Church Fathers and Mothers, and realized that I don't really put any of that to good use. When I was first introduced to the countless volumes of theology, sprituality, and religious philosophy written during the first eight centuries or so of Christianity, my gut reaction was sheer joy. I thought to myself, "This is some good stuff, and no matter how much time I spend reading it, I'll never exhaust it!" My second reaction was anger - how could I have gone through my entire life, even graduate from a Christian college and still not know how much beautiful theology was really out there, hidden from me for all these years. My third reaction was more along the lines of determination. Since I was given the opportunity to be exposed to these writings, focusing primarily on this during seminary, I felt a duty to show everyone I knew the benefit to be found in the ancient halls of Christian history. So, in an effort of good faith to carry this out I am going to highlight a particular Church Father or Mother each week by picking out some of my favorite stuff as a gift to you (maybe you'll like it as much as I do).

Longest interview ever...

When The Apprentice first aired, at the time I could not believe that these people willingly submitted to a 16 week interviewing process. So far the process that I have gone through with World Vision is not much different. I first submitted an application and resume the first week in October. The position I applied for is the manager for The Storehouse, in the South Bronx. It is a community resource center that supplies the needs of children and families in the area. They provide school supplies for Title 1 schools, building materials for run-down apartments and churches, office supplies for churches, clothing and toys for kids, and soon they will also offer pharmaceuticals for children. Right now they are working with about 175 different churches and community organizations to distribute the supplies The Storehouse gets from retailers and other donations. The warehouse itself is about 35,000 sq ft and almost takes up the whole block. Needless to say, it's a big place and the job will take some getting used to...but I daresay it is much better than the job I've got now.
They finally contacted the first week in November and I had my first interview with The Storehouse director. On November 30, I met with three of the other directors of different progams in New York City. After getting the okay from them, I was sent up to the next level for an interview with the executive director of World Vision New York on December 15. I didn't hear anything for a few weeks, but I was assured that things were moving along. Finally, on Friday I had my last two interviews with members of the advisory board for The Storehouse. Assuming that all goes well, I should be getting a formal job offer this Tuesday or Wednesday. I guess that means I might not hear anything for another week at this rate! It's been twelve weeks since I applied, so I guess one more week won't make much of a difference. I'll keep you posted.

Weirdo!

Since I have recently been spending more time on my blog, and my wife doesn't want to make anybody else do this, I have been tagged to write about five weird habits I have.
The rules are: "The first player of this game starts with the topic . Five weird habits of yourself, and people who get tagged need to write an entry about their five weird habits as well as state this rule clearly. Don'’t forget to leave a comment in their blog or journal that says, "“You are tagged"” (assuming they take comments) and tell them to read yours.
Without any further delay, here are the five weirdest things I do (according to Suzy):

1. I count. Without realizing it, I will have counted to 80 or so while walking across the parking lot or down the street. This is not something I consciously begin, I only realize it deep into the process.
2. I am picky about my writing utensils. My pens have to have a fine point and the cap must line up with the label. Now that I think about it, everything on my desk has to be at right angles as well. (I'm not OCD, am I?)
3. I like to shave designs in my facial hair. When spring rolls around and I trim my beard, I like to leave some massive chops or fun mustaches before trimming it down to a goatee.
4. Patience is a virtue, one that I possess...until a certain point and then I snap, and it's usually not a pretty sight. Hmm...maybe I'm not patient after all.
5. A nervous habit of mine is to chew on the longer hairs of my mustache...ok, that is weird.

That's about it, I'm not that strange and I really am not that obsessive or compulsive...but I do have some odd habits. Since everyone that I know who even has a blog has already gone through this excruciating exercise, I guess all my friends out there without a blog are off the hook.

Demon breath!

If you own a cat, you know what I am talking about. There is nothing worse than having an adorable cat sitting in your lap enjoying a nice time of bonding when she looks up and yawns, sending a cloud of noxious gas into your face. This cartoon captures it quite well.

Woe is me!

I ran across this painting by Durer yesterday when I was looking at stuff about Job. I was feeling a little sorry for myself and found a little comfort knowing that Job had it a lot worse than I do. I sincerely cannot imagine having boils all over my body (not to mention everything else that happened to him). Don't worry, I'm not scraping my boils with a potsherd. Anyway, the painting shows Job completely exasperated and just down on his luck. I must admit I have been feeling a little of the same, but the point I want to make is that Job's wife is taking care of him. My own wife has been utterly wonderful. She has fixed my meals (what little I have been eating), given me my meds, and everything else I have needed. When life gets bad, a great wife is all you need!